Stop and try again

The last few weeks have been crazy and busy. So much going on and changing and being more active. Started riding my bike to work everyday, started going to the gym once or twice a week, plus house chores and walking/hiking with jasper.... and fighting off colds. My system finally had its say mid last week when I started thinking that I need to stay home and rest. Finally happened on Friday. Then what did I do? I woke up early Saturday morning, as usual, and proceeded to mow the back lawn, go to the market, then grocery shopping, hiked, and then realized I should slow the f-down. Needless to say an hour after waking on Sunday, I was exhausted. Took the melatonin again after a week of not taking it. Apparently I do need it. The tooth pain, pain and what not kept me awake and not fully resting for a good week or so. The tooth pain has thankfully gone down since my quick trip to the dentist last Wednesday. There is a lesson to be learned here, I am sure of it. For right now, trying to calm down this flare before the nasty humidity hits this week.

Since coming back from APLA 2012 in Wolfville, many things have changed. For one, my perspective on life. I decided to stay here. I love my house, my neighbourhood, my friends, and family. The thing I didn't like in my job got changed and approved. Will be taking on the added duties starting September. This was a major victory for me. My mom and best friend jumped for joy, my supervisor sighed in relief and was glad to keep me around. I made it known that one of the reasons I was looking at changing jobs was to have more duties and to be able to do more of what I love. I felt like I was finally walking on settled group, a feeling I haven't had in a few years. All of the sudden, I was finally settling into my house and personalizing it more. I was also doing more and bought a bike instead of doing renovations to my house that would make it more marketable. Priorities changed. There was that zest for life. 


Fast forward two weeks and I realized that as wonderful as that zest is and desire to be doing well and to be healthy that I forgot something in there. I overtaxed myself and forgot that I can't do it all. I need to have both that zest for life and the wisdom to know my limits. It is all a learning experience. I want to keep up and do it all. If all you do is push, push to keep up.... it does nip you in the bud later on. I'm still an early adapter to this fibro thing and haven't pushed myself so much yet that I am constantly in the state of pushing (meaning constantly in pain) because I do give myself a chance to relax and can find ways to reduce my level of activity. I have also learned to listen and learning self-compassion. It goes a long way.